Suncoast

One of the most beautiful movies I saw in the recent times. Movies about death and grief are something gives a lot to think about life. Sometimes such movies focus on the person who is dying but this movie differs from the fact that it focuses on the people around the person dying.

It shows us a different perspective of death and life. Nico Parker was awesome the scene where she expresses her feelings finally was beautifully acted. Woody Harrelson adds his charm to any role he performs. Laura Linney was great as usual.

One of the interesting thing about the film is the friendship between Nico and her school friends. Usually they villanise such characters but it was good to see that they showed real friendship.

Life is finite, it is temporary. It is fact that is difficult to accept. We always look forward to anything which gives us hope of life after death. That is one of the major comfort we get from religion and God. If there is no God life just becomes meaningless. 

Do not miss this little gem.

Gallipoli

 For the first 30 to 45 minutes I was wondering if I am watching the movie which I actually read about. Because the first half of the movie is not about war. You see the harsh and beautiful Australian outback and an athlete. Mel Gibson is introduced only after few minutes into the film and Mark Lee plays a more prominent role than Gibson.

The last 15 to 20 minutes the movie gets serious and we can actually feel the tension of war. The ending will definitely get through us. Many movies have captured the futility of war. Whoever wins humanity loses. It definitely gets to us when we think about so many innocent young men have lost their lives in the name of war which is more of ego battle between leaders. Even The Bible is full of wars.

It is proven again and again war will not solve problems but still we resort to war. While we as human have  lot of other challenges in front of us we ignore all that and choose to fight with each other.

The movie only stresses that point and it does that beautifully.

Tryst with BSNL

Telephones have always fascinated me. Especially the one with older model dial pad. I used to love even the dial tone. We had our own landline very late compared to my friends and neighbors. Whenever I got a chance to be alone with a telephone I used to play with the dial pad. I used to dial random numbers and cut them without answering. I used to get such opportunities whenever I visited my Dad's office during Saturdays or when I visited some of my rich friends.

Those days the telephones used to smell differently. There used to be a scent which was used over the telephones which gave that scent. Sometimes I remember it was even used as an alternate to body perfume.

Before we received our own we used to receive calls at our neighbors and they will give us a shout that we have a call. We will feel sorry that we are causing trouble to them but we had no other choice. Also we should be conscious of the time we speak.

When my parents applied for one I was elated. The process was to apply with the telephones department by paying a deposit and you had to wait till they provide you with one. We received it in 1999 and I was already an year out of college. 

By the time we received ours the dial pad had changed to modern button based one. But still I loved it. We had our own landline and was happy that I can fill the telephone column in all application forms.

Over the period Chennai Telephones had undergone so many changes. I used BSNL for my internet connection as well. The service level continued to deteriorate and sometimes can frustrate you beyond what you can take.

Today I surrendered my almost 22 year number. I didn't want to do that but the phone was out of order for 2 months and they didn't care to fix it. I was left with no other choice other than to close it. The process was pretty simple than expected. They didn't ask me anything. It was as if they were just waiting for me to come with closure request.

The memories of BSNL and our number will always remain with me.

Summer Holidays 4 - Palayamkottai

 Read Part 3 here 

There used to be a vast agriculture land near my grandfathers house. Usually during summer holidays in the month of May, the field will be empty. In fact I have never seen it green. It will always be dry with the left overs of the harvest. During evenings our favorite thing to do is go there and spend as much time as possible there. It is a great spot for flying kites. Far away we used to see passing trains. In between us and the train it is just the harvested paddy fields. Many times we used to attempt to walk till that railway line but never made it. 

We includes me and my holiday friends. These are friends I meet only during the summer holidays but we never felt that we had a years gap between our meeting. We will continue from where we left. It will be almost like nothing has changed. Those few days I spend with them has always felt like forever. Those days are so fresh in my memory. They have now have moved on to different parts and I was able to meet only one person few years back. 

The field used to contain purple flowers which used to smell like lemon. Another favorite activity is to fly kites from these fields. In city where the skyline is overflowing with cables and the fields used to provide unobstructed skies where many people can fly kites.

There used to be a small temple and a small shop near the temple. Small pocket pickles used to be favorite snack which we used to buy from the shop.  

There used to be many tamarind trees around and you will find lot of tamarinds in the ground. You will find ripe tamarinds, not so ripe, just right ripe etc. Each will taste unique.

The canal nearby used to be full of running water and I remember my Dad taking me for a swim. I used to be scared of the water and at the same time excited. But over a period it became dry and we used to cross the canal and go to the other side where we used to have huge trees. Now I can find only sewage water in the canal and there is a huge wall constructed on the other side so you cannot cross and go other side.

Playing with cycle tires used to be another favorite activity. Everyone will have a tire and a small stick to drive it. I remember the day when a protruding cable from the tire punctured my palm deep. I still have that mark in my palm.

I will leave the rest for part 5.

Knowing - The Movie

Not sure how I missed this movie. This move actually gives the kind of dread about the D-Day which certain D-Day movies fail to create. 

This is not the usual disaster movie and the way it links biblical prophecy makes it a little more scary when it is visualized. The visualization of the prophecy of Ezekiel made a good impact which I couldn't feel when I actually read it in Bible.

I was able to relate to the movie more as it touches upon the question which goes through in my mind every day. Is the world run by determinism or randomness? I know no one could give the answer and movie also doesn't try to.

The movie makes us feel how the "end of days" can arrive. I was reminded of the Australian movie "These final days". That movie comes closer to this movie in terms of the impact it creates about the last moments.

This movie is scary because it just reasserts the fact how vulnerable we are while we keep planning for our tomorrows which may never come.

The special effects were really great.

Summer Holidays - 3 - Palayamkottai

 Read Part 2

From Tirunelveli to Palayamkottai where my Grandfathers home is used to be another interesting part of the journey. Since he was a car driver by profession for Thalayuthu cement company owners sometimes he used to bring his Jeep to take us from the station to home. Othertimes it will be some Ambassador car and sometimes it will be a black Amabassadaor taxi. That's the only time we get to travel in a car in that year. It will feel so good to just touch the car. The car's those days used to have a distinct leather scent. It used to have a small table fan placed in the front. After loading all the luggage, the car will travel towards Palayamkottai. The way the steering wheel rotates inside the drivers hands used to be a treat to watch.

The first landmark would be the famous double decker bridge, once we cross that the Thamirabarani bridge. We will lean out to see if the river had water and always it used to have but sometimes it will be in trickles. Then we cross TVS and then the famous "Oosi Gobiram" church and then Vannarapettai and  then the play ground and finally we have to take a turn towards right opposite the Palayamkottai bus stand. It is a road which will branch from the main road and it used to have a vast open space on the right where you will notice small temple like structures. You will also notice lot of goats around that area. As we travel further inside there will be a small provision store and then famous Daily Thanthi Adhithanar house and then a small bridge across a canal. Our grandfathers house was right at the bank of the canal.

When we were young the canal will always be having abundant water and it reduced as we grew and now sadly it has become a sewage. As we get into the house I will try to absorb in as much scenery as possible and look out for my summer holidays buddies.

The entire place used to have an unique scent which is a mix of the scent of dried palm leaves used for roofs, the scent palm fruit, the scent of just harvested paddy field, the scent  of huge tamarind trees, scent of the cow dung used to layer the floors , the unique scent from the canal water, the scent of hen house etc. It used to feel like heaven and we have just arrived there.

My Grandfather's house was constructed well above the ground level and we have to climb few steps to get inside and both sides of the steps we had the platform to sit and talk. The kitchen used to be separate from the main house. The kitchen was very small and it had thatched roof and to get inside you have to bend and get inside. At most the kitchen can accommodate 3 people. Earlier they had stoves which used wood as fuel and later they upgraded to kerosene based stoves. Since it was always summer when we were there the kitchen will be very hot but still we used to love that place.

On the right side of the house there used to be a huge tree which used to have small black seeds. Behind the tree there used to be the bathroom. We cannot call it a bathroom because it's an open space with a huge cement basin to hold water and an hand pump. You have to first pour some water into the hand pump for it to extract water. The water used to have a distinct scent and taste. As soon as we had landed we head to this space to take a bath. No hot waters just pure cold water. While my grandfather fills the cement basin we used to take bath till our hearts content. We used to use Chandrika soap which was my grand fathers favorite. 

In those days to finish your number 2 you have to sit behind house in open and cover the dump with ashes. I remember sitting there in the open ground in harsh sun and having a good dump.

to be continued..

The Elite

 Jealousy is one feeling which I find difficult to avoid. Though we have been brought up that it is wrong that is the first feeling that comes when we see someone getting something which we cannot even imagine. When we start looking at it under microscope we also have certain things which another group cannot imagine having. And this loop continues. So there is always someone above you and there is always someone beneath you.

Why is this world having such disparities? Isn't everyone equal? Didn't GOD create or intend it that way? The famous Sivaji movie dialogue that "Rich gets richer and poor gets poorer". 

Is that a result of capitalism? Will this be solved by moving towards communism or socialism? How did such disparity come in first place? How come someone became rich and someone became poor? 

I feel initially the disparity was a result of talent someone possessed. There is always difference in the capability of individuals. Someone can do more naturally and someone cannot do more naturally. For ex. someone is born healthy and someone is born physically challenged or someone has specific talent while others don't. But there is also a "by choice" decision. Someone chooses to work hard and someone prefers to be lazy and idle around.

In the olden days the guy with that extra strength and/or talent would have performed better and the weaker ones would have always taken his help. As part of this transaction one person keeps gaining more than others. When this happens over a period one becomes wealthy. Now the one with talent when he has offsprings he passes on the talent. Naturally we start to see one lineage doing better than other. While these happen wealth also sometimes gets passed on to the untalented ones through luck.

But predominantly the one with talent and strength became wealthy and during the course people who were lucky and another group which wanted to become wealthy through shortcuts also shared that wealth.

Whatever we are now seeing is not a healthy disparity where talented is wealthy and others are not. What we are seeing now is a system which started out well but got corrupted in the process.

So we see in this world there are things only the wealthy has access to and they are wealthy not because of their talent but because of luck and/or shortcuts.

Now, when someone who got ended up on the wrong side because of this corrupted system becomes jealous is it wrong? Is The Elite really Elite?

Deux jours, une nuit

 

"Two days, one night"

After a long time, chanced upon a great movie "Deux jours, une nuit ". The movie shows that life is not that easy. We may have to make some difficult choices. But what is your priority while making those choices? The ending of the movie establishes this beautifully. It shows what empathy is, integrity is, humanity is, GOD is.

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. - I Corinthians 13:13

My experience with Covid

It all happened like a dream. Few people near our house were diagnosed as covid positive. I even saw them getting into an ambulance while being taken for quarantine facility. I didn't give much thought into it.

People stopped playing in the street. One night while I played outside my house with my kids near my home people looked at me like an idiot. I even told my wife if I'm diagnosed as covid positive it will be blamed on this act.

Few days later I was told a few more people from the same family tested covid positive.

Then one day corporation officials came and told two people from each house must undergo testing. I was just getting ready for work that day. I volunteered to go for testing while my parents were not for it. But my dad and I went for testing.

I had a feeling I might be infected because I was having a mild cough and sometimes felt breathing was tough. But I didn't know if it was my imagination or real. I told my dad about these thoughts and he told me not to be afraid.

We went to the testing facility and came back and took head bath to wash away the Corona.

Sunday morning around 830 while I was sleeping I received a call from an unknown number. When I answered, after asking lot of questions I was told my results were positive. My daughter was lying near to me and I moved away from her immediately. They told me an ambulance is on its way to take me. Fear crept into me and I called out for my wife and told her I tested positive.

I felt sick to my stomach and started wearing a mask inside house. I had my breakfast and coffee. People from corporation came. Lot of discussion happened outside while I remained inside. Everyone advised me to tell them that I will home quarantine.

I started packing. I sent mails to office. Finally got a call from one Williams who said he was the ambulance driver and he was outside.

I took my bag and went out. There were many people outside. I waved to everyone and ambulance took off. There were already 2 people inside the ambulance. They were Hindi speaking and ambulance was stuffy and hot. The driver drove like a maniac.

So many things were going in my mind. I didn't know where I was being taken. I was thinking whether it was safe to be sitting with those people so close, Was it alright to touch the insides of the ambulance, what will happen to my family, what happened to my dad's result, will I ever come back etc.

The ambulance stopped at another place for picking one more person. It was getting very hot inside with no ventilation. When asked for fan, the driver told 'it will spread faster with fan'. I was like 'what the h?'. We picked the fourth guy and sped towards kk Nagar with siren blaring. The siren was a first for me.

The ambulance entered into an institute in Ekkatuthangal. There were chairs and we were asked to sit in shade. We were told that they will take xray, blood test, bp test etc and then we need to meet a doctor who will decide your fate. I'm famous for fainting during blood tests so that added to the anxiety. I could see few babies, who were just months old, to 70 years elders waiting for the test.

I went through all the tests. I asked the blood test lady to be kind while extracting blood but she acted like she didn't hear me. I could understand as she had so many people in queue. Luckily I didn't faint. I met the doctor and asked if I can home quarantine and he said institute would be better and allotted  a facility close by my home. They provided me lunch and I had it with mixed feelings as I still couldn't understand what was happening. After sometime we got into a tempo traveller and were on our way to the facility as the sun was setting.

It felt like prisoners being taken to the facility, like we have seen in many Hollywood movies. The ambulance entered the facility and finally came to an halt. After few minutes wait we were asked to go in. I was expecting that they will allot rooms but we weren't. It was tea time inside for the hall I entered was buzzing with activity. I immediately noticed people from my neighborhood. They asked me to take tea and snacks. The tea was horrible and the snack was a sprout I despised. Finally I ended up in a room.

It felt strange. I didn't know what's next. I sat there in the bed with weird thoughts. Many people called me relatives and friends. Dinner was roti and veg biryani. It was ok.

Life showed me how unpredictable it can be. One moment you are at home with your loved ones and then you are there in a place which you thought never existed.

There was a routine in the quarantine. At 07:30 you get Kabasura kudineer, 08:00 break fast, 08:15 tea, 13:00 lunch, 16:30 tea and snacks, 19:00 dinner, 19:15 turmeric milk.

Though the food was good it can can get repetitive. Restrooms were decent. No water problems. They cleaned the room daily.

People played cricket in the evening. They also played cards and ludo. There was a hall where television will run at least for 23 hours. There was a great camaraderie between everyone.

Everyday morning they will call the names of the people getting discharged that day. It will be good to see that and wait for our turn, counting the remaining days. I had two roommates. One always wanted to play something. The other one was a nice guy.

I had to take medicine everyday, vitamins mostly.

One of my roommate got discharged on a Monday, the other one on Tuesday while I got discharged on a Wednesday.

I had so many questions as I got discharged. Will I affect my loved ones? Is it right for me to go back home? AM I CURED? Was I even infected or was it all a huge conspiracy !!!!!!!

It’s been almost two weeks since I got discharged. Sometimes I miss the quarantine life where you just sit and do nothing.

Still have no clue what heck is this Virus.

Fast Forward Rewind

I might have blogged along the same lines in the past because this is one thought which flashes through my mind always. While I was a kid I longed to be a teen. The uniform for teens were full pant while kids should wear shorts. So always thought wearing the pant will somehow make my life better but it only became worse. I now wanted to finish school and be in college as I thought I will have more freedom in college and I can decide which class to attend and which one to bunk. But when I was college I felt the pressure to score higher marks which means attend as many classes as possible and clear without arrears. I wanted to finish college as quickly as possible and settle with a job and settle I did but happiness was far away from me. Office was hell it started with some wrong jobs and the right again asked me to write exams. I thought may be a girl will make me happy and got married to end up with more problems than when I was a kid. Everyone said all you need is a kid and now taking care of a kid comes with tonnes of problems. I now look longingly at retired people. I look forward to retired life but I know it will come with even more problems. Even reaching retirement age will be a miracle. May be instead of fast forwarding I should rewind and become a kid but if everyone did we will go back to the dust from which GOD made us. When I peer outside the window I feel like everyone is happy. I see people happily going to work, school may be even to hospitals. I am sitting here and typing this.

Summer Holidays

The counting starts even before the holidays start. When annual exam dates are announced the countdown to the summer travel starts. Its not to a different fancy place we travel every year. It's the same place every year but the excitement was always the same. Infact the excitement is still the same. 

Then tells Dad that the ticket has been booked. It's always Mom, I and my Bro. Dad always stays back. Those were the days before online booking and tickets were made of thick brown card boards in small rectangular shape. The first question on our mind is will we get window seat. Since it used to be me and my brother I used to greedily long for two window seats. But usually it will be one or none. As I grew I also wished there will be a girl in the near by seats. It even came true once but nothing much happened.

The next question that follows is which train it is? As each train has a different route. Is it Nellai/ Sethu/ Quilon? While Nellai goes through Madurai Sethu goes through Manamadurai. It was always Egmore and Central was a whole different world until we made a trip to Bombay.

We pluck the ticket from Dad's hand and look at it lovingly. The images all that's waiting flashes through. Sometimes the message is it is waitlisted or not available? These were always consumed with lot of pain but always we used to get the ticket somehow.

Now we get lost in the tentacles of the exam and each day is painfuly longer. Tamil, English, Maths, Science gets over and the last exam is History and Geography. While go through the dark corners of history and travel around geography of the earth using Ganga guide our mind always wanders to the date of travel. The day before the last exam is always longer than the other long days. 

When we return after writing the last exam we are excited with two feelings. The first feeling is about enjoying the days till we travel and the second about the travel itself.

While we enjoy the week or so before the travel with the afternoon sun on our head and kuchi ice creams from the guy who brings the ice cream cart, we also count the days before we travel.

Then the packing starts by taking the suitcase which has been on rest and gathering dust since the last travel. This happens over a period of three days and we start wondering about what to pack for dinner during travel.

The day of travel arrives and its usually a Saturday and Dad has half day that day and the train timing is usually between 1600 to 1730 depending on the train. Dad is expected by 1300 but we do not see him till 1330 and those were the days we neither had mobile nor landline. We start waiting for him discussing anxiously what's delaying him. At last he arrives and atmosphere is electrified. You can almost touch the happiness and energy in the air. Fight between me and my brother on who will take the window seat starts.

All packed and set the journey to Egmore starts. We need to walk to Palavanthangal station to take the suburban train to Egmore. I don't remember the walk to Palavanthangal station but as the train nears Nungambakkam and we start seeing glimpses of long distance trains parked the excitement increases. As we near Egmore we can smell it in the air. There is always a pleasant smell associated with Egmore it hits you in a pleasant way.

We get down from the suburban train and wait till the crowd thins and take the steps to the long distance train station. The sound of announcements about the arrival and departure of trains hits your ears and we search for our platform and it is always the farthest. Sometimes we cross the tracks instead of taking the steps. Those days I don't remember the station being as crowded as it is nowadays. 

One of the main differences between Chennai Central and Chennai Egmore in those days was the trains running from Egmore were meter gauge while the other was broad gauge. The meter gauge trains will not have that additional seat on the other side.

We reach our platform and the train is not in yet. In few minutes you can see the train being pushed into the station and you can see the last wagon with the X mark. It will always come in the reverse direction as this end is always dead end. It is a fantastic feeling to watch the train slowly coming to a halt. We wait for the coach numbers to be pasted into the coaches and in the mean time crowd thickens. While we walk towards our coach we look at the AC coach and the first class coach with envy.

Once we identify our coach we climb into the coach and search for our seats. The act of taking the steps by holding the two bars on the side is a memorable one. Once we identify our seats mostly disappointment will await us as we will not have a single window seat but when we do have one we will grin ear to ear. The suitecases are pushed beneath the seats and Dad slights the train the walks over to the window. We press our face against the window bar and try to take as much as possible of the station scene as we can experience this only after an year.

Those days the vendors will be pushing carts loaded with cool drinks, snacks and magazines. While  they push the carts they will be shouting "cooooool drinksss" and make a "Trrrrriiiiiiiiiiiiing" noise by rubbing the bottle opener over the cool drink bottles.

Dad will buy one drink for us and usually it is Fruitnik mango flavored drink. We can also see ice creams, coffee , tea being sold. The sound of "Coffee/tea" will be so enchanting to the ears. 

While we wait we can see a train in the other platform start.

We keep checking the watch to see how many more minutes pending for our train to start. There is usually a jerk when they connect an engine and that is a sign the starting time is near. Dad looks to the engine end and confirms "Signal potutan". We hear the whistle sound from the guard. 

The train starts with a jerk. What a feeling it is. Dad walks along and we feel sad to see him not joining us in the journey. At some point he stops and we say "Ta ta" by waving our hands. He slowly disappears from the view point and we settle down comfortably to enjoy to the fullest what awaits for us in the summer of that year.

Covid 19

Never in our wildest imagination we would have thought the scenes from the movie Contagion will happen in reality. It is just close to some of the apocalypse movies we have seen unfold in screen. The lockdowns have made life real difficult. Things we have taken for granted came to grinding halt. I hope this doesn't result in anarchy.

Everyone looks at the other suspiciously. Every day the news only gets depressing. As I am writing I haven't noticed any silver line or anything promising.

Who would have imagined schools will be shutdown indefinitely !! Students were promoted by default. May be while we were students we longed for such a situation but when it is reality it doesn't look attractive.

People taking the name of GOD has reduced. People are only looking at doctors as GOD now. I have never heard of Church cancelling Sunday services.

All hell breaking lose in stock market.

I wish the situation improves and life returns back to normalcy. I wish I will get to read this blog and think back about these scary times. So many people have lost their lives they wont be getting another chance.

I hope there will be hope for the next generation,

So long, my friend

The news that my best friend is no more came as a rude shock to me. Best friends stay always in touch, not in my case. The last I met him was 6 years ago in Mar 2013. That visit happened after almost 12 years if I am right. With him goes so many pages in my life. There are so many firsts that happened with him. He was like a pillar of strength during the school days. Even though we had to go separate ways right after eleventh we managed to keep in touch, that is till 2013.

Not a single day goes without me planning a visit to meet him but now when I know that the visit is never going to happen it is indeed painful. I curse myself for not making that visit. So many unspoken words will now remain unspoken.

Nungambakkam was the connecting point for us. How many times I have walked through Loyola to his home. The last time we met he dropped me at Nungambakkam station. I never knew that will be the last time I will see him. I was going through a rough patch at that time and he spoke so many encouraging words.

The times we roamed around in his BSA SLR are still fresh in my mind. The Lacto King candies we shared. The adolescent teenage talks we did. These will never go away from my mind. From now on only  I will carry those memories as you are not there.

We know the bitter truth about life that everything should come to an end but still when it happens it hurts.

I know his family is going to miss him more than anyone else.

There are so many things to write. I don't know what to write.

My dear friend I am sorry I didn't make that visit. Wherever you are I hope we will meet again once more.

Success

What would someone consider as success in a persons life? When can someone say that the person has lived a successful life? What is success? Is it all about money or is it much more than that?

We call anyone who has earned more wealth as a successful person. Is that success all about? There are people who had more money but now they don't. So does it mean that success is all about earning more wealth and sustaining it? There are people with more wealth but tarnished name should we consider them in successful list?

Does GOD also play a role in defining success? There is someone who has earned more when he is 21 than anyone who is 60 but dies at 22. Will we call him a success? There is someone who has earned just enough wealth but lived till 80 and has seen granddaughters/grandsons children, should we call them success? A child who loses his parent young grows up to be a wealthy person is he successful or a child who cherishes his parents love and lives to see their parents complete their life can be called successful?

Is it all about to each his own?

A man who is not affected by how people define him but rather knows himself, should we call him a successful man? A man who lives in constant fear on how people define him but has more than enough wealth should we call him a success?

A person  who only has enough money for next meal but spends most of his wealth for others should we call him a success?

If we look at the broader picture of life it is very short. The life which seemed like a long one while we were kid looks like a very short one by the time we grow up. As we grow up we realise time is infact running faster than we thought. School years which seemed long now passes by very swiftly in a blink of an eye.

Looks like in the long run nothing really matters. Ecclesiastes in the Bible also laments about this but in the end everything is and illusion. I think only if we are given that chance to understand GODs purpose we will be have answers to some of the queries.

Kalaignar

Two things are certain in life birth and death. Nowadays birth is not certain. Between this birth and death what do we accomplish? Only few becomes legends and Kalaignar is definitely one. With him goes so many memories.

After Death

Recently read an article that it takes a decade for a body to fully decompose to skeleton state when buried 6 feet under. I always assumed it will be a lot faster than that. It is kind of scary to lie there for a decade waiting to decompose.

Some Experiences

Some experiences in life stays with you forever. You will be able to relive those memories again and again in your mind. Even if we get another chance to experience it, it will never be the same as the first time. And when we look back and realize that the first time is the only time and we will not get another chance it mind of incites a feeling within which I am unable to explain. Those experiences and memories are so unique that no one else however close they may be will be able to experience it as we did.

Sridevi

Non-healing wounds

There is a saying that time heals everything but I guess even that comes with exceptions. There are indeed certain wounds which doesn't heal even after long time. Sometimes it can even become more painful. It's like once the damage is done it's permanent. Everybody gets one life and for many that is not a pleasant experience.

There's also another saying count your blessings sometimes even 1000 blessings cannot heal one disaster.

The "road not taken" feeling is for another blog.

Bhogi

While we were young Bhogi used to be more special than Pongal. The preparation for Bhogi starts few days earlier in terms of buying the best drum. Especially the Saidapet market area used to have so many varieties in drums right from the original "clay skin drum" to latest plastic ones.

Once you buy the clay skin drum the next job is to have a proper drum beating stick. It will be mostly a stick from broomstick with a ball of tar placed at the top. We used to search for tar melt it and them put it as a cap at the end of the stick. With the right size your drum will generate great noise.

Will the drum in hand we will be running around making a hell of noise.

Then comes the actual burning and heating your drum over the roaring fire and tuning it is a pleasant experience.

As we grew it became more about staying awake the entire night for Bhogi but getting permission from parents was difficult owing to the weather. Still we used to stay awake late and get up early. The thicker the fog the more happy we were. There were times when we had used "thennai olai" as material for compound wall and during Bhogi people will take away those things.

Looking at the fog outside I feel the burning factor of Bhogi remains the same but whether this generation kids will get to see the Bhogi we did remains a question.

The Dhalapathy song made Bhogi even more attractive.